Goofy Samsung Customer Service Issues

I recently decided to order the relatively new Samsung NC20. I originally read about it in this Wired review, then found that it’s also the highest-rated netbook in a recent study by Consumer Reports.

Strangely, the NC20 is not offered on Amazon, my usual retailer of choice. So I attempted to order it directly from the Samsung website. [Update: it's now available on Amazon. But it wasn't when I put in the order.]

I got all the way to the end of the order process, and thought the deal was done. I never got a confirmation email, though. Still, I do a lot of online ordering, and I figured I’d give it some time, and just see if the computer came.

Weeks later, it hadn’t come. Every few days, I would go back into my email and search the archives for “Samsung” and other keywords, thinking that perhaps a confirmation, or non-confirmation, email had actually arrived, and I’d just overlooked it. Nothing. Since I live in an apartment building with no doorman, I have a box at the local UPS Store, and that’s what I’d used as my shipping address. I walked over there several times to make absolutely sure that my computer hadn’t arrived. The guy behind the counter noticed my repeated visits with no result, and suggested that perhaps I was the intended recipient of a mystery package that he was keeping behind the counter. My hopes rose, but the package wasn’t for me. Nevertheless, he and I would discuss it again two more times before we both gave up on the idea.

Today… and this must be at least a month later… I decided to call Samsung. I had pretty much written off the whole thing, convinced that I hadn’t really placed the order, or hadn’t finished placing the order, or had received an email explaining a problem, but had mistaken it for spam and deleted it without reading. But I wanted to call, just to make sure. I was actually a bit embarrassed as I waited on the line, preparing to defend myself to a befuddled phone rep who would not be able to find any record of my order in the system.

But I was in for a surprise. Here is a summarized, paraphrased transcript of what happened next.

S: You wanted the NC20 laptop, right? Yes, I show that you did complete the order.

M: I did? So what happened?

S: It was cancelled.

M: I cancelled it?

S: No. We cancelled it.

M: Why?

S: It was flagged.

M: Flagged for what?

S: It’s hard to say for sure, but based on my experience, I’ll take a guess. Your apartment is 3R?

M: Yes.

S: When you filled out your billing address, did you write the exact same thing that it says on your credit card statement? Like, “Apartment 3R” instead of just “3R”?

M: I’d have to check. Would that really matter?

S: It might, in a densely populated area like Brooklyn. Also, it looks like you asked for the computer to be shipped to another address with a different dwelling number.

M: Yeah, that’s my UPS Store box. I had to have it shipped there, because I don’t have a doorman here, and I’m not always home.

S: My understanding is that we don’t deliver to freight-forwarding services.

M: Is the UPS Store a freight-forwarding service? They don’t forward anything to me; I just pick it up.

S: My understanding is that it’s considered a freight-forwarding service.

M: Okay. So if I have it sent to my apartment, and I check to make sure that “apartment” is written exactly the same way on my credit card statement and the order, will it go through this time?

S: Probably.

M: What?

S: The thing is, I can’t be sure why your order was flagged. They don’t tell me. They’re trying to prevent identity theft, fraud, and other crimes.

M: But have we not established that I’m not trying to commit any of those crimes?

S: Well, I’m sure you’re not. But suppose, hypothetically, that you were. And now you’re calling back, trying to figure out what you did wrong, so you can get away with it this time. Would it make sense for Samsung to give you that information?

M: I guess not.

S: It’s all being done for your protection.

M: That’s reassuring.

S: Here’s what I’d do if I were you. Place the order again, and have it sent to your apartment, but this time, use a different credit card.

M: Why?

S: Because that will reduce the chances of the order getting re-flagged. If you use the same card, then your previous order is going to come up. You want to avoid associating your new order with your previous order, in the eyes of the people who are doing the flagging.

M: Hm, that’s actually a good idea.

S: Anything else I can do for you?

M: One last thing. I looked and looked, but I couldn’t find an email from Samsung letting me know that my order had been cancelled. It probably came, and I just accidentally…

S: No, it never came. We didn’t send you an email about this.

M: What?

S: Let’s go back to that hypothetical scenario, where the flagging was legitimate, because you were trying to commit a crime. However, due to our flagging system, your crime had been foiled. Now, we wouldn’t want to send you an email, letting you know that you’d been caught in the act, would we?

M: Are you serious?

S: It’s for your protection.

M: So, if I go back to the site and order another computer, how will I know that I haven’t been flagged again?

S: If the order goes all the way through, you should get a confirmation email within 24 hours. If you don’t get that email, it means that…

M: I know what it means. Thanks for your help.

Note to Samsung: The above is a summary, and the phone support guy I dealt with was a true professional. Don’t get him in trouble. He defended your retarded policies as diplomatically as could be expected of any sane person.

Dear person at Samsung who made this policy: There is something wrong with you. Let go of any sharp objects you may be clutching, and make your way calmly to the nearest mental health care facility.

image by CarbonNYC